I’m what some might consider a bad mom. I am an educator, so what I am about to say will probably make other educators and parents judge me, but I truly do not care. I’m also considered a racist and ill-prepared to teach (despite my credentials and my many accolades which are obviously lies🙄) to individuals who were reprimanded for stalking me at my last place of employment. This last event taught me why I will continue to advocate. They could look me up because I “talked too much about Blackness,” during Black history, but my methods of pushing our students to defy assumptions made about them were wrong. Today I laugh at my 2019 as I complete my evaluation with my supervisor and as I have several speaking engagements lined up, discussing the issues that students like my son face.
My son has moved schools five times in five years. He attended the same school from kindergarten until his fifth grade graduation. These are the years that promoted me to truly see how our Black males were treated. His school administrators; (all White) were so evil and rude. I refused to pull him out and we pushed them to do better for all of our minority students. It was a charter school and the founders were unethical. I remember the last time I ever met with the founder of the charter school and how she stood up, slammed her chair to the table because she was angry with me. I politely told her I appreciate meeting with her, which made her angrier. This was not the first time I witnessed White educators angry with me for advocating for my son or other minorities that are treated unfairly. They never know much about me until the meeting. A friend of mine who is a principal does the same thing. He introduces himself, but never let the teachers know his career. This year his Black sons teacher found out after her ill-made comments about his son. I enjoyed reading the email he sent to the teacher with his title. Why do we need to do this for our Black males?
Back to my son: His seventh grade teacher disrespected one of his peers, my son told me and because his mom was unable to advocate, I did. Most years I volunteered at the schools. And because of this, I saw first hand what our minority students face in an all-white setting. They become uncomfortable…. and parents that advocate are seen as “trouble-makers.” I’m one of the biggest ones! Hmmmm maybe someone will send me a shirt with that. Oh! I made one and sent them to educators with the hashtag #MakeThemBelieve 😳.
I still have parents call for advice and share their concerns. Many are parents that are extremely intelligent, but when they are confronted by White teachers who deem their Black sons as “below average” they need help…
It’s taxing. It’s annoying. It’s actually fuc$ed up. But it sums up the issues that minority parents face and are facing now during COVID. Because of my “behavior” along with others, his fifth grade graduation was hosted by.. me! The parents complimented us and helped in so many ways because his White administrators threw a temper tantrum that year because parents were tired of them hurting our babies.
Many will never be able to understand this. I listen a lot when I’m around educators complain about our kids and honestly it’s sickening. It’s sickening because they are oblivious to the purpose of education. It’s not about judging a student, but it’s about taking the tools that we have from practical life and our textbooks to create options and hope for our babies.
My sons 11th grade guidance counselor hurt his feelings. I hurt his feelings. His dad has hurt his feelings. We all hurt each other’s feelings.
She judged him based on his past. She made false assumptions about him and because of his issues with racism last year, he was giving up. He shared with me what she said and I had to take off mommy hat and be rationale.
He had a 3.something until this year. He transferred to a predominately White private school with kids who have known each other most of their lives. She didn’t know what he went through; living through a coma, seeing and witnessing racial issues last year in Kentucky, but she judged him based off of what she thought or who she thought his parents were.
I’m absent this year (or was until COVID) so his dad is now the single parent. He is also a cop. He works late hours, so Anthony has not just transitioned to being with his father, but also to a new school AGAIN. Her comments were one that our black males face from White teachers and even with my emails correcting her, she still did not get it and will not get it.
During COVID, what are you doing to ensure our young males who are overpopulating our prisons will remain hopeful? It saddens me that there are no many educators still with biases and will avoid the issues versus deal with them. I spoke with a White male I respect and he shared that it’s hard for some to hold such conversations. Passing judgment on my child, you would never know how smart he is just like so many other students I teach; particularly our Black males.
Educators are complaining and failing to see the big picture. This is our time to truly give without many restrictions, so enjoy your babies and PUMP them up to believe in themselves.