I watched my young teen work hard today. I watched him take initiative as my mentor, his granddad (he has known Anthony since before he was born) helped him organize our POD.
We are not just moving, but we will be separated for his last two years of high school. He looked at me and told me “Mom I will be ok.” And I know he will. He also shared other personal things that touched my soul. We have been hugged by a community that only spent one year with us, but has fallen in love with us (mainly him).
Today I realized that although this journey has physically separated us, we will always have an amazing connection. We have so many things that only we share. When we are in the car, he still holds my hands sometimes. Our go to restaurants are Waffle House and Cracker Barrel. He knows just what to order me and he knows all of my PIN numbers… until I change them and then forget them. He is my sunshine daily and he told me I know him best. He shared with me the lessons he learned and the most important one that I know he learned was to stand up for yourself. To do what is morally right, even when it means you have to admit you might have lied is another lesson he learned; your puzzle is not always full of bright colors.
I had a lesson about that the other day too. I lied last year. I lied to someone because I was exhausted. I couldn’t take another moment of deceit from them. I could have been honest, but I was too hurt and broken. What I did was I kept my ex husbands items because having him know where I lived was too hard. You see he cheated on me and he did so many other things and I couldn’t bear handing them to him. It was not because I wanted the items, but seeing him or even his friends were too hard for me. So I sat his items on the street. As a matter of fact, I had my pastor come over to collect items for a yard sale, and we prayed together that my new journey would be good and ….
I told him I needed to get rid of those items, and he agreed. I sent my ex emails and texts asking him to set up a time to retrieve his items. He didn’t. Well, he did after I moved. I tried to arrange for him to get them but he would never respond to my messages. So, I moved and left them on the street. But I had my movers put them on the truck. I did this because in good conscious I couldn’t leave his military items there. They were items he had when he was deployed. I have no clue what was in there but I do know he lost soldiers and there were probably many memories there.
So the movers put those items on the truck and I placed them in my new storage. Here I am moving exactly a year later and I still have his items. I admitted to him that I lied. It wasn’t hard, but I felt bad ONLY because …. I suppose we all feel bad when we lie. Even if some would say I have reason to lie to someone that hurt me.
But today as I saw my son pack and the convo we had about my ex’s friend picking up his items, he learned a lesson. He took something that many will never have the courage to do; he saw someone admit their lies.
I share this story because in life; your character and reputation alone is enough to “wipe you out.” My mentor stood by his word and came to help us pack up the entire truck. My son was there to witness me admit my lie. Those two things are lessons that I know will be embedded in his mind as he goes to live with his dad.
And of course I’m only a flight away and a phone call away, but this journey will definitely be one that I will never forget!